The first 24 hours

My mom and I had bought a house together in April and on the last weekend of September she went back to Vermont to visit with her friends. I daresay that weekend made her the happiest she had been since moving in with me. She was homesick for Vermont where she had lived for most of her 69 years. She came back happy and exhausted on a Sunday. On Monday she called and told me to come right home after work because she could not meet my daughter off the bus. I called her to see if she was alright. She had received a pretty bad cut the week before and was planning to have it checked. She told me that now something new was bothering her and it had been for weeks but now it was at the point that she had to see the doctor. It was a pain in her leg and on the phone the nurse had worried it may be a blood clot and my mom should come in immediately. When I told my boyfriend that he immediately asked if I should be driving my mom to the doctor? I look back on that day as so interesting that it didnt hit me to be worried. My mom was invincible to me. I did call and ask her but in her prideful way she told me that was silly and she was fine. When she came home about 4:30 she was limping and worried. The doctor had taken a blood test and told her that if it got worse or hot she should go to ER. My mom refused dinner with us and asked instead for take out. Take out is what we called it when she didnt eat with us but my seven year old daughter brought a plate up to her. Because she was in no mood for company, I brought up the plate on that day and found her on the computer where she told me that she was trying to diagnose herself. She was looking at deep vein thrombosis as the most probable suspect and it didnt make either of us happy. By nine that night the pain was so bad she could not stand on the leg. I asked her while my boyfriend was there if she wanted to go to the hospital. Her pride spoke again and she said no. I understand the pride and I didnt push. I watched tv with her and she moaned and groaned. By ten I knew this couldnt go on all night and she did too so she decided to try to walk to bed and get some sleep. I text messaged my friend and coworker Kristin and asked her to put plans down for a sub for me in the morning. I knew something wasnt right and I had that pit in my stomach when you just know you cant handle what is coming next. My mom's struggle to her bed did not help the pain and when I asked if I should call the doctor she said, "No, just lie down with me." Oh how I wish I had stayed on the bed longer, touched her back, her shoulders, not been so scared in her time of need but just there for her. Instead I stayed there maybe a minute before I jumped up and said that it was time to call the doctor. They told me to call an ambulance and when I told my mom that she thought I was lying. We were laughing and she kept asking if I was just saying that because I didnt want to drive her. I called my friends who came to get my daughter for the night and I calmed her down that Grammy just needed to see a doctor because she wasnt feeling well. My mom spoke with her too and that helped. We were both scared poopless and yet strangely calm. We were together. We were okay. The emts were absolutely wonderful as they guided my mother to the ambulance. I rode with them and debated calling my brother and sister...the problem...they were both far away and I didnt want them worried when there was nothing they could do. I was afraid my brother would try to drive to us and be too tired and worried and it would be dangerous. I was afraid I would wake my sister's young family and she would be a wreck. Looking back I know that it all doesn't become real until you tell somebody. My mom finally got a room in the hospital at five that morning where they would keep her under observation. I called my brother at 5:45. Finally, I had somebody to share the burden with other than the person going through the hardship. I finally broke down. He said he was on his way. Although I felt he shouldn't have to come, it was a major relief to know I wouldnt be waiting for the word alone.